Save Money, Help the Environment and Improve Your Health, Vol. 1: In the Kitchen

The Go Family's ongoing journey toward health has had myriad positive side effects. One of which has been the mind-blowing expansion of my at-home cooking knowledge. Another has been saving a boatload of money by doing said at-home cooking.

Did you know you're allowed to make your own condiments? It's true! And it's not even hard.

The following are all so stupid easy to make that even seeing the prices on them in the grocery store makes me pull a lemon face. In no particular order, here are some of the staples in our kitchen that are not only free of hidden additives, but save you money, help the environment by creating less waste and make you sound really cool by going full-on DIY:

1. Salad Dressing

Look at the ingredients list on the back of the salad dressings at the grocery store. I dare you to find one without added sugar. Ok, there's probably one or two for $6/bottle, but why waste your money and then have garbage to throw away at the end when you can make your own in the old pickle jar you have sitting on the top shelf of your pantry?

Here are some easy, yummy vinaigrette recipes for literally a fraction of the cost of store-bought. We've been on a Ranch Dressing Bender that has the added bonus of being high in fat (see #4 below). Extra credit for growing your own dill on your windowsill.

basil, dill and cilantro

2. Salsa

Canned salsa has a different taste than fresh, but I'm not at the canning stage yet and fresh is so easy to make and tastes so good that I see no reason to stray. 

I use this recipe but in a batch with 3 tomatoes instead of 6. Throw your ingredients in a food processor and that's literally all there is to it.

Compare $2 per fresh, delicious batch (roughly 16 oz) with the price of jarred salsa at your grocery store, and then start questioning all of the purchases in your cart.

3. Almond Butter

Prepackaged almond butters at the store are so expensive it hurts my eyes to look at. Our Whole Foods does fresh-grind for $8.99/lb, but you can get $6.88/lb raw almonds on Amazon Prime Subscribe & Save (or $8.08/lb for a one-time purchase). (I could do a whole post on the virtues of Amazon Prime but I'll condense it down to say on S&S you get 20% off the things you buy on a monthly basis.)

Toast the almonds for 10 minutes at 350 and then food process the hell out of them. Honestly just let it go for like 10 minutes, scraping down the sides intermittently, until the oils release and you get creamy dreamy almond butter of a consistency to your liking.

If you want a step by step, Google 'easy almond butter' or just go here.

4. Mayonnaise

The mayonnaises are suspiciously never refrigerated in the store so I had no idea the ingredients include raw egg. But lo, combine an egg with light olive (or sesame) oil and you get delicious, additive-free mayo! 

I use a combination of this recipe and this recipe from my bro, Sarah Fragoso. Mustard and cayenne in your mayo is most excellent and highly recommended. Use an immersion blender for maximum impact and minimal time investment. 

Use your homemade mayo and windowsill herbs in your ranch dressing to impress your dinner guests.

A Note About Supplies

The only thing you might not already have to make most of these is a food processor. We bought this Cuisinart in 2011 and still use it on the reg. (Side note: make your own smoothies in this bad boy. Half a frozen banana, a couple frozen strawberries and some milk. Throw a spinach leaf in there for the baby, she'll never even know. DO NOT go to Jamba Juice for this shit or I will disown you.)

This Cuisinart immersion blender is also pretty rad. It's almost worth it just for the mayo alone, but I've used it to make mashed potatoes and other creams as well.

Honorable Mentions:

5. Pizza/Pasta Sauce

While not a staple, I make it once every couple months or so and it's so crazy easy I can't even walk down the sauce aisle anymore without having a fit.

Don't pay upwards of $3/jar (for comparable quality) when you can get a can of tomato sauce and tomato paste, throw it together with an onion and some spices for less money, and not have to deal with another glass jar floating around in your pantry.

I use Sarah's recipe from this book that I use allllll the time, but you can Google 'paleo pasta sauce' and get some ideas.

6. Gluten-Free Bread

While not a condiment, Babs loves a good ole Almond Butter and Jelly sandwich, and you can't make those without bread. You can get fancy with it, just like you can with anything, but the Gluten-Free (Paleo) bread recipes I use have about 5 ingredients. They usually require a lot of eggs and mine never seem to rise to a traditional bread shape; they're more like biscotti. But it's mainly a vehicle for almond butter anyway so it doesn't matter.

it's so flat. maybe my bread pan is too big??

This one was Babs' favorite for a few weeks, until she moved on to the 'nothing but smoothies and pie' phase we're currently on.

7. Sauerkraut

There's not huge cost savings here, since you can get a can of Kraut for .79 and a head of cabbage for .69, roughly. But Mr. Go claims to like homemade better, so I do my best not to get cuts on my fingers before I make a batch. Learn How to Make Homemade Sauerkraut in a Mason jar here.

The Extra Bonus: When you make these things yourself, you not only save your hard-earned money for better things like retirement, you also have a reason to reuse your old mason jars instead of paying for packaging and then throwing that packaging away.

Live Green and Save Green. 

Why I Want my Daughter to be Like Me

Please don't misunderstand my last post; I'm awesome. Self-love and confidence are very important. There are way more ways I want my daughter to be like me than not. I do my best to really play up my good qualities for her, since she is a little sponge and soaks up absolutely everything I do and say.

a happy little sponge

1. Kindness (Generosity/Empathy/Selflessness)

These are all connected; one runs into the other in a cycle of goodwill and harmony. You see someone in need, you understand how you would feel in their position, you help them.

I get a thrill when I help someone. The other day a guy dropped some money on the ground and I helped him catch it as the wind blew it around. He was so appreciative; it made my day. I want my daughter to know this feeling; the most harmless (indeed, beneficial) high there is.

2. The Power of Choice

When I get crabby and Mr. Go asks, "What's wrong?" My response more often these days (rather than "you did x, y and z!") is, "I just need to get over it." We can't possibly control all situations or, heaven forbid, other people. What we can control are our reactions and our emotions.

Really, that's the biggest win of all. Someone acts like a jerk? They must've had a bad morning, or they're lacking the inner light you possess. The winds of life blow them around like a cloud. Poor them, it must be so exhausting. Take a moment to pity them, then carry on with your day; you are a mountain, steady and strong, Master of Your Own Emotions.

3. Adventurousness

This is a relatively new quality of mine that could use some more cultivating, but it's growing all the time. Going to a restaurant by myself, joining Meetup groups, talking to People: even tame things like these can make me uncomfortable, but I get such joy out of it at the end that it's worth it. And the more you do something, the easier it gets. I want this to always be a part of my daughter's life, so she doesn't have to struggle to learn it later, like her mom.

Explore, Babs, the world is your clam, or some other type of shellfish.

4. Chill

As high strung as I am about some things, I'm a pretty laid-back person in general. I go with the flow, I'm usually up for most of the adventures Mr. Go proposes and it's pretty hard to offend me. Life is easier and more enjoyable if you're not digging your heels in, riding the brakes and trying to make everything to go your way.

This has the bonus side effect of Self-Love and Confidence: Ever notice how much easier it is to be happy with yourself when you stop caring what other people think of you? When the only standard you have to live up to is your own? I used to only get there when I was too exhausted to overthink; now I'm a frequent visitor to this state of mind, if not a permanent resident.


Really, I could go on and on about my admirable qualities, but it's starting to get a little self-congratulatory.

Point is, if you want your children to grow up to be generous, contributing members of society, it starts with you. They want to be like you, for better or worse; use a big spoon like mommy, swipe at a cell phone like mommy.

And if they're going to parrot you anyway, you might as well give them something good to imitate.

Why I Don't Want My Daughter to be Like Me

As parents, our job is to make as many mistakes as possible, so we can learn from them and pass that knowledge on to our offspring.

We want the best for our kids, and sometimes that means knowing what in ourselves we don't want them to be.

When I can, I try to ask myself this question before taking an action: Would I want my daughter doing this? Kids learn by example. You can tell them "do as I say not as I do" until you're blue in the face but they're clever. If mom can do it, why can't I?

In the 2 years since Babs has come to be, I've identified several more traits than I thought I'd be able to that I don't want her exhibiting.

1. Woefully Inadequate Anger Management

Note to self: next time I want to slap some sense into Mr. Go, take a breath and ask: would I want my daughter feeling and acting this way?

2. Oblivious Accidental Selfishness

Stay present in each moment, Babs. Whatever's got you wrapped up in your head isn't as important as the here and the who in the now.

3. Serious Face

Not only do I have a literal Serious Face that shows up when I'm lost in my head-- squinting, brows down, lips tight-- I take myself way too seriously. You only live once; it'll be loads more fun if you can laugh at yourself and your mistakes. Because there will be a lot of them.

4. Get Out Of Your Basket

When something is new and different, historically I haven't been terribly open to it. I'm a recovering Excusahol. Life will be richer and more exciting if you take chances, have experiences and get out of that safe, comfortable basket.

It's easier to give this advice than to live it, but if there's anyone I could do it for, it's my daughter. Yeah, you should want to better yourself for yourself, but sometimes that's not enough. And I've found that having a kid is the strongest motivator there is.

You've gotta start somewhere, and there's no better time than the present.

Babs Turns 2

Throwing a toddler birthday party doesn't have to be a wild affair. I know, you only turn 2 once, and she gets SO excited by NEW things.

But on the other hand, a $1 package of balloons and a visit from Gamma is all this girl would've needed to have had the best day of her life so far.

So maybe we overdid it a little.

Someday we'll learn. You don't need a gigantic pile of birthday presents wrapped in wasteful (albeit festive) Disney Princess paper to have a good time. Alas, today was not that day.

But it sure was FUN! (Probably just as much, if not more, fun for us to watch her as for her to open gifts and play.)

Gamma and Gampa, Babs' former Nanny and her Fiancee and two honorary Uncles were there to celebrate 2 years of sleepless terror joyful life. We had snacks, visited, watched Babs open presents and then play with them. I FaceTimed in my folks (who had to miss the event due to my mom's cracked tibia). We sang Happy Birthday (now Babs' favorite song) and Mom helped her blow out her 2 candles.

These Paleo Cupcakes were DE-licious. I added literally one drop of red food coloring to the frosting (ivory from the coconut sugar) and it turned out a pretty dusty pink. I was pleased. Mr. Go and I were still easing out of our Ketogenic diet cycle, so it was the best thing I had ever tasted in my whole life ever.

We'd created an Amazon wish list for the Grandparents so we could carefully curate Babs' toy stock. It didn't help much. My mom loves wrapping lots of tiny things, so we still got clothes and such. Which is fine, since Christmas taught Babs the joy of tearing off paper to reveal something new.

Here are the items that were on our wish list:

Rad Batman Quad
Swing (or as Babs calls it, Pinger. Why? No fricken clue, but I laugh every time.)
Tunnel
Corduroy Bear
Bubbles

Those specific bubbles were not purchased for us, but I wanted them SO bad, and let me tell you why. The library uses them at the end of every story time and the bubbles hang in the air FOREVER. A+ bubbles are hard to find.

Pinger, mama. Pinger.

A good time was had by all, especially my girl. The day was a thorough and wild success, and I'm already looking forward to the next one, while at the same time hoping it never comes.

Stay little, my sweet girl. But also grow up so you can wipe your own ass, 'cause that one's getting a bit tired.

Tips for Eating Ketogenic Diet Foods on the Road

You know how sometimes you have processes in your life that would be so wildly unheard of to most people that you just don't bother trying to explain it? (What, no? You don't have those?)

Well, this is one of those things. But I trust you to have a open mind.

A few weeks ago Mr. Go and I decided it was time to do a little reset. We'd just come back from Gulf Shores after stuffing ourselves with all the seafood and booze we could get our hands on.

So we fasted for roughly 36 hours (Don't tell my dad, he'd be so mad at me) and then for 2 weeks ate as much fat as we could handle. 

(A little aside on fasting: When you fast, your body initiates important cellular repair processes, such as removing waste material from cells (read: cancer), levels of insulin drop significantly, facilitating fat burning, and blood levels of HGH skyrocket. Read the article that I just copied and pasted these facts from HERE.)

Ketogenic Diet

When your body runs out of glucose (sugars from carbs or other sweets) to burn, it creates and uses ketones as fuel, from the breakdown of fat in the liver. Here's a really good explanation on the mechanics of it that I won't bother boring you with.

Fasting is a quick way to get your body into ketosis (the state of burning ketones), but you could also eat Keto style for a while, and eventually you'd fall into it. But you know Mr. Go is all about efficiency. (If you're interested to know if your body is actually in ketosis, get some test strips to pee on.)

Eating Keto style is basically 70% fat, 25% protein and 5% carbs. That 5% translates to about 20g of carbohydrates. Check the labels on all the processed foods in your fridge and you'll find you probably hit that at breakfast. I'm not judging you, things like onions and carrots contain carbohydrates, which are good and necessary for the body, but the excessive consumption of carbohydrates is where you run into problems.

You want to get your net carbs each day from a crap ton of vegetables. Like, as many vegetables as you can physically stuff into your person. The link above and This Site have pretty good tables listing the carb content in veggies and other types of foods. When in doubt, google 'QUESTIONABLE FOOD X' and 'NUTRITION' and Dr. Google will tell you.

So here's what a daily Ketogenic meal plan would look like:

Brunch between 9 and 11 a.m.

• 3 eggs/person, scrambled with a hefty dash of coconut cream, cooked in bacon grease or coconut oil
• A couple slices of bacon, or other leftover meat/fish
• Aforementioned crapton of veggies (brussel sprouts, spinach--raw or sauteed, asparagus, kale, broccoli) cooked in bacon grease, butter or coconut oil or a combination of the three

Dinner between 4 and 6 p.m.

• Fish or fatty grass-fed beef
• Crapton 'o veg (see above)

It's actually super easy to cook. Easier than making myself a plan of all the "recipes" I want to make for a week and going shopping for those ingredients. I just load up my cart with green stuff and fish. Bam. Done.

Health Benefits

Don't let me fool you, this is only the second time we've done this. But already I can tell I have wayyyyy more metabolic flexibility.

The first time we fasted, my body was so dependent on glucose for energy that I felt incredibly weak and tired, and couldn't even continue the fast for a full day. Then the high fat content in the keto diet did a number on my innards. I won't go into detail on that.

This time around, I blasted through like a rock star. I didn't even complain. (Shut up Mr. Go, I can sense you rolling your eyes.) Ok, fine, but I definitely complained less than last time. It's progress.

We drank a lot of water and watched a lot of T.V. Chasing after a toddler requires a lot of energy that was kind of difficult to muster up. But if you can make it to around 5 p.m., you're golden. We went to bed early that night to sleep away the misery and didn't really even feel the need to rush into breakfast the next day.

And this time, my gut isn't so freaked out by high fat/low carb meal compositions! Gold star, gut, you're a champ. And I know that if for some crazy reason I'm not able to get food into my body for a day, I'll be more or less ok. (For reference, in high school if I didn't eat within an hour of waking up, I'd get the dizzy shakes.)

Keto on the Road

So, if you're in a keto cycle and you have to go on a road trip, how do you eat on the road without knocking your body out of ketosis?

1. Pack your own snacks
2. Just...don't stop to eat

We thought we were brilliant. Save money AND avoid roadside fast food? Why did we not do this sooner?

We were packing a cooler for Babs' snacks anyway, so we brainstormed some good fatty, fibrous snacks to eat on the go. They certainly weren't full meals by any means, but we'd just proved to ourselves that we could go over a full day without eating anything, so we were pretty sure we'd be fine. And something magical happens when you load up on fats, protein and fiber...you don't get hungry as often.

Here's what we packed:

1. Just a big ole chunk of ham
Something fatty. Bonus points for eating it like a savage straight out of the package. (See photo 1 above.)

2. Hard boiled eggs
Tiny oval-shaped packages of protein sent from heaven

3. Asparagus
Even tastier raw than cooked, imo

4. Homemade ranch dressing
Here's a recipe. In absence of homemade, get the purest plainest mayo available, and the fat content will be wonderfully through the roof.

Like this one

5. Hard cheese
Not soft, like colby jack or cheddar (which is just mozzarella with food coloring, my friends). Go to the specialty cheese section where all the $45/lb cheeses are and get yourself a tiny slice of hard aged cheddar, and then savor every morsel.

Let me clarify, this is not a thing we do on the reg. But on occasion, after we've let ourselves slide and I find myself snacking on Babs' cereal, we feel the need to break our body's dependency on carbs.

But as far as packing healthy snacks for the road and avoiding the stress (mental and bodily) of finding a good place to stop and eat while trying to make good time and keep Babs happy in the car--that's a no-brainer.

bonus photo of Subey packed to the gills again and Babs with a bucket on her head

Unpopular Parenting Decisions (And Why You Should Make Them)

This parenting job is full of tough decisions.

From the ones you think are tough at the time (what stroller should we get?) to the lose-sleep-at-night kind (who should we choose as our nanny?) to the deceptively simple with potentially life-threatening consequences (should we let the babysitter take Babs in her car?)

What it all boils down to is What is Best for Your Kid. Not what's best or easiest for you, though sometimes in rare occasions those two will not be mutually exclusive, such as when a harried mother (read: me) needs to set the baby down to cry and take a breather outside.

Many times these decisions will be at odds with the opinions of others. For example:

As much as I wanted to sleep at my childhood home when visiting my parents, their house is just too small (bad for quiet naps), and had 2 other guests at the time, so we stayed with Mr. Go's family much of the time, to my family's perfectly understandable dismay.

Or, when we had lined up a babysitter for Babs, but the day before, she mentioned that she wanted to take her to a kid's function with her 3 kids. It would probably have been great fun, but Mr. Go has witnessed her driving, and we weren't comfortable putting Babs in that situation. So we said 'thanks but no thanks' and found another sitter.

Anything that can make that kid's life easier or better, you just gotta do. Screw everything else. If anyone dares to question you as to the best course of action for your child, feel free to tell them this. But make sure to thank them passive aggressively for their advice. Just kidding. But they'll probably feel like a jerk anyway, so that's like a bonus.

Don't be afraid to break the social code of excessive politeness. Even (especially?) with family and friends. Their intentions are probably pure, but ultimately you know what's best for your kid. Period. Full stop. End of discussion.

For a people pleaser like me this is sometimes a struggle, but I remind myself at the end of the day, nothing is worth jeopardizing my daughter's comfort (or god forbid, safety), especially not the awkwardness of telling the moms in Mom Group that Babs isn't going to eat their well-meaning gluten muffins.

A Toddler at the Beach

Imagine lugging your squirmy, loud, completely-without-boundaries-and-prone-to-running-off toddler to a vacation destination surrounded by people and drowning hazards. Sounds fun, right?

That's what I thought at first, too.

Three weeks ago, Mr. Go, Babs and I took a little drive to Gulf Shores, AL. I haven't written about it (or anything else for two months) because I am the human equivalent of a bag of garbage. So here's how it went:

You know what? Babs loves new places. New people to look at. New things to do. (Sand? Seashells!? Putting sand and seashells from one bucket into another?!? GOLD.)

Plus I had backup. The whole reason we took this trip is because my Aunt was renting a condo for the whole month of February. So since she was down there, my Uncle decided to go and rent his own place and make it a lil vaca. And while we were there ANOTHER one of my Aunts came to visit.

wrapping Uncle Hulk around her little finger

Also Mr. Go has a cousin who lives there, and so his Uncle and Aunt were there vacationing since January.

So we had lots of family time. It was awesome. Everybody couldn't wait to get their hands on Babs. I hardly had to touch her the whole time (except when there was a dirty diaper involved. typical).

Since it was so early in the vacation season, things weren't all that busy. There were just lots of snowbirds going to happy hour and having early dinners. And since it was chilly, we only went swimming one day. Babs wet her feet in the ocean and got up to her waist in the pool. It was very exciting.

being passed around the lunch table like a tray of tapas

We found out that women of a certain age are all 'Gamma' to Babs, which delighted them all to no end. Babs adored all of her Aunts and most of her Uncles, probably because they had no reservations re: letting her watch as much T.V. as she wanted and giving her questionable toys that mean ole Mom and Dad had deemed too dangerous. They were like Grandparents in that way, except worse.

Babs. Loved. It.

We spent a lot of time eating, and talking about where to go for our next meal. Mr. Go was incredibly excited about eating sea food for breakfast lunch and dinner. I was slightly less excited, but enjoyed most of it, if only for the experience and making Mr. Go happy by eating oysters with him. But I did very much enjoy these crab legs and Mr. Go's lesson on how to eat them.

Aside from visiting and trying to coordinate 8+ people and a baby for meals, we took a nice walk at the Gulf State Park, where there are miles of paved trails alongside the water. We spotted a couple turtles and apparently there's a three-legged gator named Lefty who lives a few miles up that you can go see (but we did not).

taking a walk at the lovely state park

Going to the Zoo

Zoos are so much fun. Anywhere we go, we'll definitely hit up the zoo. Gulf Shores had a cute little zoo where you could actually feed the animals. Not the cool ones, like the bear or the tigers, but you could feed goats, kangaroos, llamas, ponies, ducks and deer.

I didn't know if she'd do it, but Babs was fearless and frankly it was alarming. You know how goats are in the petting zoo, they'll swallow your hand if they think you have a piece of food in it. And Babs was just shoving her hands at them like, go on take it! She didn't care. I was a little concerned about losing my digits, but that girl didn't know any better. Which is good; I hope she keeps most of that fearlessness.

The coolest outing was Alligator Alley. I mean, it was way overpriced for what it was; you go and look at alligators, but it was also super rad. It was a cold day, so they weren't feeding the gators, but it also meant that we were the only people there (a bonus for any outing).

We saw tiny 5" baby crocs, all the way up to terrifying 11' nightmare-inducing monsters. Walk the boardwalk in the swamp and get within mere feet of modern day dinosaurs.

pretty sure this one was stalking Babs

You could also hold the dinosaurs alligators. This little dude was about as old as Babs:

Mrs. Tell is made of steel and couldn't wait to get her hands on a gator

don't let that easy smile fool you, the man was terrified

The Travel

It was only a 8.5 hour drive from Arkansas to Gulf Shores, and we did it during the day so Babs was awake most of the time. On the way there she decided to give mom a hard time and not nap very long, so I chafed my underarm twisting my arm back around to hold her hand and give her toys and food. 

She was pretty good, though. We stopped a couple times to let her stretch her legs, and otherwise she played with toys and was occupied with little snacks.

On the drive back she slept a lot more, having been worn out by a week of playing with loving Aunts and Uncles. Still though, having movies and games loaded on your phone is a lifesaver. (The Fisher Price apps --the ones that say no in-app purchases-- are Babs' favorite.) 

Sometimes FaceTime with Grandma is the most useful. If you're lucky like we are, she might read your little one some books and keep her occupied for up to 30 minutes. This is where Guided Access comes in handy so she can't hang up or exit whatever app you want her to play with.

The extended-family time we got on this trip meant a lot to Mr. Go and I. It's strange being able to relate to your Aunts and Uncles as adults; it changes the dynamic of your relationship a little. But in a good way.

I count my Aunts amongst my friends now, and am grateful for the means to spend this time with them, so Babs will know her great-Aunts and Uncles and have a relationship with them. 

I'm also grateful for having a place to crash for a beach vacation.