Unpopular Parenting Decisions (And Why You Should Make Them)

This parenting job is full of tough decisions.

From the ones you think are tough at the time (what stroller should we get?) to the lose-sleep-at-night kind (who should we choose as our nanny?) to the deceptively simple with potentially life-threatening consequences (should we let the babysitter take Babs in her car?)

What it all boils down to is What is Best for Your Kid. Not what's best or easiest for you, though sometimes in rare occasions those two will not be mutually exclusive, such as when a harried mother (read: me) needs to set the baby down to cry and take a breather outside.

Many times these decisions will be at odds with the opinions of others. For example:

As much as I wanted to sleep at my childhood home when visiting my parents, their house is just too small (bad for quiet naps), and had 2 other guests at the time, so we stayed with Mr. Go's family much of the time, to my family's perfectly understandable dismay.

Or, when we had lined up a babysitter for Babs, but the day before, she mentioned that she wanted to take her to a kid's function with her 3 kids. It would probably have been great fun, but Mr. Go has witnessed her driving, and we weren't comfortable putting Babs in that situation. So we said 'thanks but no thanks' and found another sitter.

Anything that can make that kid's life easier or better, you just gotta do. Screw everything else. If anyone dares to question you as to the best course of action for your child, feel free to tell them this. But make sure to thank them passive aggressively for their advice. Just kidding. But they'll probably feel like a jerk anyway, so that's like a bonus.

Don't be afraid to break the social code of excessive politeness. Even (especially?) with family and friends. Their intentions are probably pure, but ultimately you know what's best for your kid. Period. Full stop. End of discussion.

For a people pleaser like me this is sometimes a struggle, but I remind myself at the end of the day, nothing is worth jeopardizing my daughter's comfort (or god forbid, safety), especially not the awkwardness of telling the moms in Mom Group that Babs isn't going to eat their well-meaning gluten muffins.