How to Get Out of a Bad Investment

Bad investments, we’ve all made them. Maybe it’s something you expected to appreciate in value – like real estate or a stock. Or maybe it’s something you just thought you really needed, but don’t use – like a bike, a watch, or home exercise equipment. Because we made this purchase there is ego and pride attached to it. Our ego tells us: “Just wait until the investment turns positive.” or “I’d sell it, I just can’t get back anywhere near what I put into it.”

If that sounds like you, you’re giving yourself the worst possible advice. In addition, you’re wasting your time and headspace worrying over something that you should just do something about.

Easier said than done right?

I’ve been following a few pieces of good advice that I wanted to share:

1. You don’t need to make it back the way you lost it.
2. If you can’t afford to lose it, you can’t afford it.

#2 has been a driving force behind my decision making for a few years now, I’ve internalized it and I love it. But #1 is a harder lesson to learn.

So… here’s a story about getting out of a bad investment (aka an older Mr. Go cleaning up a mess made by a younger Mr. Go).

A brilliant 25 year old Mr. Go, with plenty of disposable income, decided to buy his lovely bride to be a $10,000 engagement ring. Impressing people was important, and surely a ring of this value would make him look like a total douche badass. So he wrote a check and the ring was his. It was custom designed by a jeweler with a 1ct round cut diamond (that sat up so high it would conveniently rip shirts and scratch people). The jeweler wrote an appraisal for the ring and valued it at $14,500. What a great investment!

Bad investment on left.

What if the ring got lost or stolen? Easy, personal property insurance can cover that; it’s only $9 a month. Mr. Go purchased this ring in April 2010.

Now comes the part in the story where I started thinking more thoughtfully about my future, using my resources to spend time with loved ones while I still can, having a kid and toning down my focus on work.

As my family has continually downsized our needs and simplified our life, there isn’t a lot of superfluous spending. And when something is purchased it always passes the test of advice point #2 and also “Will this purchase improve the quality of our life?” The flip side of the latter question is, “Would getting rid of this reduce the quality of our life?” Mrs. Tell’s answer, in the case of the ring, is a simple “No,” the ring does not add any happiness to her or my life.

But for me, it was reducing my happiness. Every year I would get this stupid premium bill for $109 to insure something I didn’t even want anymore. It wasted much of my time and headspace thinking about what to do with it. Do I stop insuring it and put it in safe? Do I sell it at a loss? Do I wait for diamonds and metals to appreciate in value? Is there a market for used engagement rings? What about the sentimental value?

It was time to take action. I submitted pictures, appraisals and the GIA report to a few online diamond buyers to get an estimate on the diamond’s value and the ring’s value. Diamond buyers were coming back with offers around $4,200. The ring was only worth its weight in platinum plus the diamond chips, so about $500. I accepted reality (remember advice point #1) and took it to a local jeweler to negotiate a deal. We reached a deal where he would buy the diamond and set a new diamond in its place.

I replaced the $4,200 1ct diamond with a $325 1/4ct diamond. The jeweler told me that in 40 years of business he had never had anyone ever come in requesting to downsize a diamond. I took that as a sign that: 1) I’m a genius to realize a bad investment and get out of it, or 2) I’m a dumbass who got himself into a bad investment (or maybe it's a combination of both).

1ct left, .25ct right. What a deal!

Now I should note, with a little expert negotiating, I walked out of the jewelry store with a check for $4,700 and a 1/4ct diamond set in the ring, making it the best offer I got anywhere else. But also noting that the only person that lost (financially) in any of the transactions described above, was me. If you’re interested in buying the diamond in this story it will cost you about $10,000 dollars in this jeweler's shop.

What will I do with the $4,700 dollars? It will go into a non-retirement investment account with every other dime I save (see The No Hassle Approach to Investing). At an estimated 6% annual return I might make my money back on this investment in 10 years. Oh, and over that 10 year period I’ll also save $1,090 in would-be insurance premiums.

There is probably a more sophisticated way to evaluate the cost of this investment, but who cares. It’s a huge weight off my mind and I’ve freed up headspace to focus on more important things. Life is great!

Mrs. Tell and I will be celebrating our five year wedding anniversary on 4/21. I’m proud to say our love for each other has grown now that our time is guided by thoughts and actions, rather than objects. And on a side note, Mrs. Tell loves the “new” ring.

If you’re sitting on a bad investment, stop letting it take time and energy from you, go do something about it.

- Mr. Go

Easy DIY Make-Believe Shield

In less than 5 minutes, make a DIY shield for toddler's pretend play. Whether she wants to be Wonder Woman, a gladiator, Captain America or something else entirely, this easy shield is guaranteed to satisfy.

What You Need:
Empty toilet paper roll
Cardboard from a frozen pizza

UDI's gluten free pizza crust comes with a delightfully small cardboard circle.

Let her draw on the shield. (Mom has a Captain America shield you can see in the background so we colored one side of her shield to match.)

Using scissors, cut a hole an inch or so in from one end of the empty toilet paper roll. This is for her thumb.

Center the roll on the back of the shield; tape or glue, and then play!

Tip: A paper towel roll is a great pretend sword. She calls it her 'sword hand' because her entire hand goes inside the end.

Faithful animal sidekick optional.

Taking Kids to El Potrero Chico, Mexico

Domestic travel with a kid is one thing, but international?

We took our toddler to El Potrero Chico, Mexico, for 10 days over Christmas and I'm here to tell you: international travel with a kid is not to be feared and you should totally do it.

When our dear friend mentioned rock climbing at El Potrero Chico, which is quickly becoming famous after Alex Honnold free-solo-ed El Sendero Luminoso, we said Let's Do It. The flexibility of my freelance work and Mr. Go's joblessness allowed us to pick up and go.

All we had to do was pick dates and find a dog sitter (for which we used MindMyHouse.com again and it worked wonderfully). We overpacked the car and, with me and Babs in the back and Mr. Go and Our Dear Friend in the front, took off.

We stopped off for a quick snooze, then continued on through Texas for another seven thousand hours. That state is enormous.

Crossing the border into Mexico required nothing more than...driving over the border. A guy peeked in the hatchback. Then of course, you have to navigate several miles to the CITEV, to obtain a Tourist Permit.

The only time we were almost hustled was right there, literally 10 feet over the border. Two men in orange construction vests flagged us down as we were trying to pull away and told us they would take us to the CITEV 'for tips.' We were discombobulated and they looked semi-official in their vests so we said, "Um. Ok."

The men went to their car and Mr. Go rolled up the window, saying to us, "We're not doing that." We waved goodbye to the two dudes and found the CITEV ourselves.

After Mr. Go obtained the Tourist Permit, we didn't stop driving until we arrived at El Potrero Chico. ODF's buddy, wife and daughter had arrived the day before and booked everyone lodging at La Posada.

The road leading up to the canyon is filled with compounds that offer camping and housing. At La Posada our friends got a little concrete house, while we got a truly tiny jail cell with a bed and a bathroom. The bed was like a rock but why would we want to be pampered in Mexico anyway.

Babs and her new friend C, one year older than her, were instantly overjoyed to see each other and hugged upon the first meeting. By the end of the trip Babs began to refer to her as 'my sister.' Aw.

ODF, the climbing expert and all-around Tour Guide of our group (we like to call him Guide Book), took us all up to the crag every day. Some days I stayed back or left early, to get Babs to nap and avoid a late afternoon meltdown. Totally worth it.

Guide Book took us up a 2-pitch on Chico Spire, my very first multi-pitch climb. Pls ignore my finger in the following picture, I was white-knuckling my phone at the bottom of the second pitch.

After Christmas there was a major influx of climbers, and everything got really busy, but for the first several days it wasn't crowded at all. We had our pick of routes and we'd set up the girls with a play tent and snacks at a safe distance. It took us a couple tries to get that part right. Some of the climbs began on the side of the mountain, with no flat area for anyone to sit and relax.

First day, not a good base camp

We found an excellent base camp just below Cat Wall, at a shrine that looks like it's filled with water in the summer. Of course, it's Mexico, so you had to jump a fence to get to it. Just ignore the signs saying not to enter. Everybody's doing it.

Climbing with a group of 5 climbers and 2 kids is a lot to coordinate, and we usually only got in 2-3 routes in the morning. They'd go back out in the afternoon to climb, but I stayed in with Babs. She was overstimulated by like the third day.

After our daily lunch from El Taco Loco, the taco truck down the road in the tiny town of Hidalgo, it was naptime, then margarita/dinner time at 5, play time for the girls and a decent bedtime for all exhausted parties.

the girls dancing at the market

Many of the hotels and restaurants hosted a special Christmas dinner. We stuck around at the restaurant at our hotel. It was fun, but possibly the only thing that wasn't worth the pesos we paid for it. The place was jam-packed, hot and we had to pay full price for our 2-year-old even though she didn't eat a single thing. But I won a shot of tequila in the raffle afterward, so. Feliz Navidad.

We had to swap hotels halfway through the trip. One of the newer establishments, Lemuria was touted as the 'nicest' place in El Potrero Chico. And it was much nicer than the last place. But the mirror in the bathroom was still not attached to the wall, instead simply leaned against it behind the faucet, and the random holes in the building seemed strange to me, a first-world middle-class American.

The grounds at Lemuria:

But the owner made us elote one night (an ear of corn with mayonnaise and hot sauce) and the communal kitchen brought all the climbers together.

Toting Babs around this little patch of Mexico was not hard. I brought a pack of wet-wipes, snacks and a couple toys with us everywhere we went and she was fine. C kept her entertained; they pooled their toys together and ran around like nutjobs.

The local folks mostly adored the kids. Those who had to put up with us for a length of time, like those who worked at our hotels, maybe got a little sick of them running around screaming. But almost everyone we met crouched down to say Hola, rub their hands over their heads and faces (a unhygenic charming regional quirk) and call them muñeca.

I got to use some of my poor high school Spanish. Most of the hotels have at least one person who speaks decent English, but once we ventured into Hidalgo, it was all Spanish. I blundered my way through a transaction at the market (to purchase a lovely pair of fleece-lined leggings that were all the rage) and it was simultaneously embarrassing and exhilarating.

Our lodging felt a little bit like staying at a resort (except without all the luxuries) because we were in a little island of English-speakers. All the guests were rock climbers. That's why people come to this part of Mexico. It secluded us a little bit. But it was a unique opportunity to meet climbers from all over the world. And all we had to do was drive down the hill for tamales, coffee and groceries to get the true flavor of rural Mexico.

Frozen Bedtime Story for Kids

Does your child ask you to tell them the story of Frozen every night? Mine does. I got tired of making up the story every night, so I wrote it out to cut down on the brain power I had to use after a long day of child-rearing. If you can get some use out of it, here it is.

[Update: Here are links to my Beauty and the Beast Story, Moana Story, Cinderella, Little Mermaid, Mulan and Rapunzel too!]

Once upon a time, there were two princesses named Anna and Elsa. They were sisters, and the best of friends. Elsa was born with magic ice powers, and the sisters loved building snowmen and playing on the ice Elsa made. One day, while playing, Elsa slipped and accidentally struck Anna in the head with her ice magic. She started to get very cold and weak, so their parents took her to the trolls, who had their own magic.

Support Indie Authors Free and Discounted Books

Do you like books?

Of course you do, you're not a monster. (Halloween pun? Anybody?)

Well then, check this out: From Friday October 28 through Monday October 31, choose from over 75 books written by indie authors in different genres either discounted or totally 100% free!

You're welcome.

How to Get a Free Dog Sitter or House Sitter

Don't pay to kennel your dogs when they'll just come back smelly and anxious. Get someone to come to your house to feed them, cuddle them, and water your plants!

It's easy: Services such as MindMyHouse.com and TrustedHouseSitter.com connect those who need a house/pet sitter with those who enjoy travel. Some people charge a fee, but many people do it free, just for a place to stay in a new city.

On many of these sites it's free for home owners to post a job, and the site charges the potential house/pet sitter to contact you.

We used MindMyHouse, posted an ad with the details and had three applicants in a week or so. The young woman we chose was just moving out to the Denver area from New York and didn't have a place to stay. She was couch surfing with her friends, but wanted some time in a place to herself.

We had her come over to the house for an interview, to meet the dogs and so we could make sure she wasn't actually a serial killer. She was super nice and great with the boys, so we set it up.

The house was kept in good order, the dogs were fed, and the night we returned from our trip, she even stayed an extra night and babysat Babs so we could go out to a concert! It was an excellent, mutually beneficial deal.

And this house sitting swap makes me think about being on the other end of the service as a traveller. What a great way to see the country, and the world! Get a free place to stay in exchange for feeding and cuddling with some animals? Sounds pretty good doesn't it?

Cloth Diapers and Potty Training

It's so easy to just wrap up a turd in a diaper and throw the whole thing away that it's tempting to forget what happens next: It goes to a landfill, where it sits for up to several hundred years until it decomposes. Yuck.

Not to mention they cost an average of 30 cents apiece (Pampers large pack on Amazon Subscribe & Save). Double-yuck.

Which brings me to:

1. Cloth Diapers

I was scared of even talking about cloth diapers. I was a new mom, still trying to figure out what to feed my child and how to get her to sleep so I could get some goddamn sleep myself and now you want me to wash the shit out of her drawers?? No, thank you.

But the truth is, cloth diapers are easy. If I had been open to it and allowed for a few days of learning curve, I would have understood that. But that's me for ya. Uncooperative. (Cue Mr. Go emphatically nodding in the background.)

There are a plethora of "diapering systems" available, which try to sell you on all sorts of shit you don't need, so here's the skinny: the cheapest we could find were Alva Baby. And they work just fine. People tell you to try several different brands to find which fits your baby the best, blah, blah. You're already going to have to wash shit out in the sink, I don't want this to be any harder on you.

Buy the Alva Baby diapers. If you get excessive leakage, maybe they don't fit right and you should try something else. But the diaper shells have a zillion snaps on them so you can customize the fit. It's probs gonna work out just fine for you.

The solid color are the cheapest, at $4.79. Get those, and you can choose what insert you want. (The inserts are the absorbent pads that soak up all the pee, which you tuck inside the colorful outer shell.) They come automatically with a 3-layer pad, which was always good for about 1 hour of wear for my 2 year old. You can choose to increase the pad to a 3-layer plus bamboo, 4-layer, 4-layer plus charcoal (which increases absorbency), 5-layer, or 5-layer plus charcoal, for $1-$1.20 extra.

Buy 5 diapers. Get 3 of them with regular pads, get one with a 4-layer pad, and get one with a 5-layer pad. 

We still put disposables on her for bedtime because she always seemed to leak. A friend of mine doubled up the pads in her cloth diapers for nap times, and even wrapped the doubled-up pads in absorbent burp cloths for safety. Her kid looked like a bumble bee with a gigantic bubble butt. But it worked.

Try them on your kid to figure out which snaps fit best. For Babs, we snapped with 2 snaps left in the middle. Snap all three of the snaps on the tabs.

Wash everything before you use them. It helps increase absorbency in bamboo. Don't ask me how. (Max absorbency is after 8 washes. Just throw them in with your laundry for a few loads. I only did it like 3 times before starting to use them.)

Washing Cloth Diapers

For pee-dirty diapers, toss them in a little bucket or a plastic bag until the end of the day.

For poopy diapers, roll the turd into the toilet if you can. If it's a real squishy raisin shit, you may have to scrape it off with a paper towel, or even rinse it in the sink a bit first. Then toss it in a little bucket or plastic bag until the end of the day.

At the end of the day, remove the pads from the shells and throw everything in the washer. Use a pre-wash or soak cycle with cold water first, then wash with the hottest water available. (Most instructions outside the U.S. say to wash them in cold water. Some people wash in warm. Honestly, whatever you do, it'll get the shit off and it'll be fine.)

Use laundry detergent free of dyes and perfumes. Do not use fabric softener. Hang to dry. Or throw the pads in the dryer on delicate if they're still wet; it won't hurt them.

If you buy more than 5 you may not need to wash every day. You may only need to wash every other day, which is great.

We only used ours for 4 months, so they barely stained and didn't smell at all after washing, but I hear sometimes that happens. Google it, there will be tips.

If you're still overwhelmed, get someone else to figure that shit out for you (literally). Your husband, your mom, your mother-in-law, a very good friend. It's ok to hand it off.

Next up is:

2. Potty Training

Babs is potty trained! She still needs help wiping, and still wears diapers for bedtime, but we've gotten away with only minor accidents.

Here's how we did it:

First, decide on a reward. Some use a chart with star stickers. Some just use a nice crisp high five. We used chocolate candy. Bribery? Possibly, but oh well.

Then, just take the diaper off. Put the diapers out of view. Let her run bare-assed through the house. (Stay home for the first day or so.) Ask her frequently if she has to potty and reinforce that big kids (and mom and dad) go pee and poop on the big potty.

Get super excited when she puts something in the potty, even if it's just a toot. Hopefully she will start wanting to sit on it. When she was getting one M&M for pee in the potty and two for poops, she figured out pretty quick that she could sit and pee a little bit, get a treat, then sit again 30 seconds later and try to con us out of another treat. So we had to get a little more restrictive with the treats.

When she started going poop without much fuss, we gave her a new pair of underwear for each successful turd. Fun colors and prints! Big kid undies! Even better than M&Ms!

She was ready for this step, and she didn't like the feeling of pee in her underwear so it was a pretty easy transition. If, after two or three days, you're still getting a lot of accidents, wait a couple weeks and try again.

Remember that in new surroundings and distracting situations, she may forget, so ask frequently. Even if she says no, take her to the potty at every opportunity.

There's nothing like the freedom and fear of taking a diaper-less kid to the grocery store for the first time. What exhilaration! She's becoming a small adult!

I miss some things about her being a little nugget, but in terms of cleaning up poop, this is one area I'm glad she's grown up.