Gluten Free Goldfish Crackers + DIY Goldfish Cookie Cutter

There are some things about childhood that your kid "misses out" on if they're gluten free. We never felt that we were depriving Babs of anything and never felt the need to make substitutions for the gluten items we cut out of our diet.

But...

When her school is doing a Dr. Seuss week with a 1 Fish 2 Fish activity, what do you do? Luckily, Babs' teacher is out of this world amazing and makes sure as much as she can that Babs is never singled out or left out.

Unfortunately there are no commercially produced fish-shaped snacks. (Except Swedish fish, or as I like to call them, fish-shaped high-fructose-corn syrup.) So I scoured the internet, made a few test batches and perfected this Gluten Free Goldfish Cracker recipe.

• Gluten Free Goldfish
• Makes about 4 cups of goldfish.
• 3 oz. Cheddar Cheese, shredded (about 1 1/4 cups ish)
• 2 TB parmesean cheese, shredded or grated
• 4 Tbs. Cold butter (I used salted; if using unsalted, add a pinch more salt)
• 1/2 c. Cornstarch
• 1/4 c. gluten free flour (see below for my blend recipe)
• 1/4 tsp. Salt
• 1/4 tsp. Xanthan Gum
• 1/2 tsp. Baking Powder
• 2 Tbs. Milk

Combine all ingredients except milk in a food processor. Pulse until it resembles little crumbles. Add milk and pulse some more to combine the dough. If too crumbly, add a little more milk. If too thin, add a bit more cornstarch.

Dust your work surface with cornstarch or flour. Lay a sheet of parchment paper over the dough. Roll out dough to 1/8-1/4" thickness. Cut out your desired shapes and place on parchment-paper-lined cookie sheet. They can be quite close together; these puff up nicely and won't spread.

Cook in preheated convection oven at 400 F for 10 minutes. If you don't have a convection oven, you may need to add cook time.

They'll burn quick, so pay attention. If they're a touch underdone, they'll still be delicious, but an extra minute is all it takes to get that golden orange color and the perfect crunch.

Gluten Free Flour Blend
The recipe, from the blog Allergy Awesomeness contains 3 ingredients:
Rice flour (brown has a better nutrient profile than white, but either works)
Tapioca Starch
Potato starch

DIY Mini Fish Cookie Cutter

Goldfish and Cheez Its are essentially the same thing, so if you don't require the fish shape, just cut them in squares and be done with it. But to go the extra mile, you can DIY your own mini goldfish cookie cutter from an aluminum can.

It's not as hard as you think it's going to be.

Supplies
Aluminum can
Knife (for starting the cut)
Scissors (not your best pair)
Duct tape

Using the knife, poke a hole big enough to get your scissors in, then use the scissors to cut the circumference of the can. Cut a vertical slit, then cut about a 1" strip.

Gently bend the strip into your desired shape. I started with the center front of the curved fish head, then bent the strip outward. Then bend each side of the strip back in for each point of the tail.

Trim off the excess. Overlap the ends and secure using duct tape.

Using small strips of duct tape, wrap the cookie cutter edges on the upper edge (the edges you will be pressing down on) ONLY.

Enjoy your fish crackers!

No Flour Playdough

Avoiding wheat flour requires diligence, because wheat is in everything. Not only can it cause problems when ingested but it can also be absorbed through the skin, which rules out Play-doh for people with severe gluten allergies.

But Gluten Free Play Dough is the easiest thing in the world to make! (And an excellent project for snowy winter days in the Midwest.)

• 2 cups baking soda

• 1 cup cornstarch

• 1 1/2 cups water

• Paint

Combine the first three ingredients in a pot over medium heat and stir until it forms a ball.

It can't get any simpler. It takes about 5 minutes of constant stirring. You can feel it thickening at the bottom, then all of a sudden it's hard to stir, then it clumps into one big ball and you're done.

Divide into portions. Dab some paint (we used Crayola washable) on each (1/2 tsp makes a nice pastel color). Fold the paint into the dough and knead to incorporate. (This was Babs' favorite part). Once the paint is incorporated and the dough is cooled, the paint won't come off on your hands.

Store in airtight bags. If it dries, it'll form a crust on the outside. You can fold this back in and knead it until the dough is pliable again. But I find after a couple weeks, the dough is spent. It becomes either brittle and crumbly or moldy and stinky. In either case, chuck it and start again! Making it is part of the fun!

DIY Kid's Avengers Black Widow Costume

She's been Hulk, she's been Thor, now Babs has chosen Black Widow for this year's costume. Maybe next year we'll branch out of the Avengers. Maybe not.

Widow Bites Bracelets

2 sheets Black construction paper

Elastic thread & hand sewing needle

Glue

Cut strips 2.5" x 4". (Sizes may vary depending on your child's wrist size.) 2.5" will be the length of the "bullets" and 4" ensures enough layers to be sturdy. Find a marker or glue stick that's the diameter you want the bullets to be. Wrap the strip around the marker and glue liberally.

Babs is 4.5 years old and I used 10 bullets for each bracelet. I should probably have done more, because when the elastic stretched, there were gaps.

Thread the elastic thread onto the needle and take a short stitch through the seam side of the bullet, about 1/2" from the short end. Stitch through each bullet. Cut the elastic with plenty extra. Repeat for the opposite short ends. Tie around your child's wrist, making sure it's tight enough to stay on, but not too tight! Keep in mind if they're going to be wearing multiple layers of clothing under the bracelet.

Black Widow Belt

Buckle

Elastic

Grey sheet of craft foam

Markers

Cut a length of 1"-wide elastic 2" longer than your child's waist. Thread one end through the female buckle end and stitch. Thread the opposite end through the male end.

I practiced my Black Widow hourglass on some paper, then used that as my template to trace onto the sheet of grey foam paper. I drew in the inner shapes and let Babs color them in red and black.

Glue the foam piece onto the front of the buckle.

A long-sleeved black shirt and black pants and she was doing parkour in the living room.

Happy Halloween!

.

DIY Greek Yogurt Recipe

I LOVE greek yogurt. It's high in protein, great for your digestive and immune systems, plus it tastes delicious.

But a tub of that stuff runs $6 a pop at our hometown store. An expensive habit like Chobani really adds up. So the DIY-er in me wondered, Can I make that myself? Turns out you can!

Save 2-3 TBSP from your store-bought tub of Greek yogurt to use as your starter culture and incubate your own batch in the dehydrator.

Supplies:

• Starter culture from store-bought Greek yogurt (straight-up, not the "blended" kind with sugar flavorings)
• Candy thermometer or a meat thermometer
• Sieve
• Cheesecloth
• Jars
• Dehydrator (you can use other things for incubators, like an oven on low temp)

1: Heat 4 cups (1 quart) whole milk to 160 F. We're killing off any bad bacteria.

2: Cool it off to 120-115.

3: Scoop out 1 cup and add your 2-3 TBSP of starter culture. Stir it up real good, get those cultures allllll incorporated. Then add it back into the main pot and stir that up real good.

4: Transfer them all to heat-proof containers, cover (not airtight--simply to keep dust/bacteria out of the jars) and set in dehydrator at 110 F for 8-10 hours. Mine typically go more toward the 10-hour end to make sure it's completely set. (Try not to check on it, but to test if it's set, tilt the jar. If the yogurt comes off the side of the jar in one mass, it's done.)

5: Let cool for 2ish hours. This step is actually important. Impatient Me has skipped this before and been disappointed. Cooling allows the yogurt to firm up even more, otherwise if you pour fresh warm yogurt into your cheesecloth, you'll get a lot of white unformed yogurt in the whey.

6: Pour into cheesecloth-lined sieve, set over a pot to catch the whey. Let strain for 1-2 hours, depending on how thick you like your yogurt. (Check out this post on what to do with that liquid gold whey you strained out.)

The yogurt will come off the cheesecloth in one creamy lump of glorious nutrition.

Store in the fridge for a week or so, I guess; ours never lasts that long. Don't forget to save 2-3 TB for your next batch!

BONUS MUESLI "RECIPE"

Muesli is traditionally an oat-based granola/cereal, but use coconut flakes and nuts instead for a lower-carb option. A couple scoops add the perfect crunch to a big bowl of homemade yogurt.

1 cup roasted salted sunflower seeds
1 cup roasted salted pepitas (aka pumpkin seeds)
1 cup unsweetened coconut flakes
1/2 cup chopped pecans
1/2 cup chopped almonds

Add in some sliced strawberries or bananas (and mayyyyybe a dollop of honey on special occasions) and enjoy.

Harry Potter Font Happy Birthday Banner +Free Downloads

Babs just turned 4 years old. And she's suuuuuuper into Harry Potter. I can't tell you how many times a day she instructs me to pretend that I'm Ron Weasley taking a polyjuice potion then turning into Crabbe or Goyle or a cat then battling a basilisk.

I won't complain (too much), it could be way worse.

So anyway, I made her a Happy Birthday banner using Harry Potter font. There are a number of font generators that you can plug in whatever words you want and print them out, but to make the banner super special like I did, I saved each letter individually, printed them and cut them out to paste onto colored paper. Red and gold because Babs is a Gryffindor, obviously.

I had to cut the double letters out of black construction paper because I'm cheap and didn't want to use ink printing them again. The letters are so blown up the edges needed coloring with a black marker and I had to color over the construction paper with black marker too to make the blacks match but hey, I made it work.

Cut construction paper into quarters and glue the letters on. Print some Hogwarts House crests too. Tape onto a string and voila! Instant happy child.

Download the H, A, PY, BI, RT, D and Hogwarts House crests.

Easy DIY Make-Believe Shield

In less than 5 minutes, make a DIY shield for toddler's pretend play. Whether she wants to be Wonder Woman, a gladiator, Captain America or something else entirely, this easy shield is guaranteed to satisfy.

What You Need:
Empty toilet paper roll
Cardboard from a frozen pizza

UDI's gluten free pizza crust comes with a delightfully small cardboard circle.

Let her draw on the shield. (Mom has a Captain America shield you can see in the background so we colored one side of her shield to match.)

Using scissors, cut a hole an inch or so in from one end of the empty toilet paper roll. This is for her thumb.

Center the roll on the back of the shield; tape or glue, and then play!

Tip: A paper towel roll is a great pretend sword. She calls it her 'sword hand' because her entire hand goes inside the end.

Faithful animal sidekick optional.

Save Money and Help the Environment, Vol. 2: Around the House

Mrs. Tell is growing her very own Money Mustache.

Mr. Go is working hard toward an early retirement and a Happy Life in general with the guidance of Mr. Money Mustache, and part of that is breaking free of the addictive cycle of consumerism. (Do I sound like a hippie yet? Just wait.)

To be less dependent on material goods, I've taken it upon myself to save here and there by implementing some DIY projects. These ideas actually came to me when brainstorming how to create less garbage, and I realized they have the added bonus of keeping money in our pockets (or bank accounts, as it were).

1. Reusable K-Cup

My soul died a little every time I threw that little plastic cup in the garbage, and so I rejoiced to use this little guy. Less waste even than traditional drip coffee makers that use disposable filters. Plus, the Keurig uses less energy by heating a smaller amount of water at a time. Every penny counts, people. Every. Penny.

2. Reusable Feminine Sanitary Products

Listen, this freaked me out at first too. But this is how ladies did it for thousands of years until Kotex realized they could make money off us. Here's a good resource for reusable pad tutorials. For those days I can get away with it, a batting or flannel-lined pad is the way to go. When my current tampon stash runs dry, the tampon-alternative Moon Cup is on my Amazon Wish List.

3. Reusable Water Bottle

I've been carrying around a Klean Kanteen for five or six years. I lost one in Kansas City so I'm actually on my second one. It's a 20 oz piece of crap that I've dropped so many times it leaks if it lays horizontal, but it's an insulator so my water stays the perfectly chill drinking temperature.

Plus, I never have to waste my money buying water like a schmuck or heaven forbid throw away a plastic bottle like an even bigger schmuck.

4. Buy Products with Less Packaging

Those packages of raisins that come pre-packed in tiny little boxes make me irrationally angry. If I ever happen to see someone putting one of those in their cart at the grocery store I'll probably...well I'll probably just judge them really hard in my head and give them the stink-eye, but only if they're not looking at me.

Instead, buy a bulk pack (or even better, get them bulk at Whole Foods and then use the plastic bag to pick up dog poop) and divvy them out in reusable snack bags (see #8) in your kids' lunches.

This one is more of a Help the Environment tip, but a lot of times bulk packs are less expensive. Just make sure you look at the per ounce price on the label, not the total price, or get out your phone and do a calculation.

5. Stop Your Junk Mail

Get yourself on the National Do Not Mail List and end those annoying credit card offers and L.L. Bean catalogs.

6. Reusable Grocery Bags

Hello, my name is Captain Obvious, nice to meet you. But even I, preaching these things to you, didn't start using reusable grocery bags until this very year. For shame, Mrs. Tell, for shame.

While many grocery stores have those bins you can bring your plastic bag full of plastic bags back to for recycling, I have a suspicious nature and don't trust that they actually recycle them. Best to avoid the plastic altogether.

7. Reusable Snack Bags

I saw a tutorial for these when I was young and carefree and thought 'why would anyone do this?' And then I had Babs, and having hidden stashes of raisins, cereal, bread and other carbs in my purse, car and jacket pockets at all times became a necessity. I found myself throwing away plastic bags left and right. And then I realized...ohhhhh, that's why people make their own snack bags.

Anyway, here's a tutorial for one.

8. Second Hand Clothing

I hesitate to even put this on here, because chances are you don't need more clothes at all. But if you find yourself in need of a rad original costume, be it Halloween or comic-con, or something fly for that special meeting, check your local Goodwill, ARC or independent thrift store, or Craigslist for garage sales.

Odds are you won't get a plastic hangar to throw away, and it should be a fraction of the cost of new, if you do it right. And before you go making a face, you can absolutely find trendy stylish clothes second hand. Bonus for it being unique and maybe even vintage.

9. Reusable Diapers

I drug my feet on this one so long that we only used our re-usable diapers for a few months before Babs was potty trained. But we still saved a pile of money, and avoided sending hundreds of non-biodegradable Pampers to a landfill. It's incredible how much room diapers take up in the garbage. And how heavy they get.

The vast array of options for reusable diapers is astounding, but I'll make it simple for you. Order 5 Alva Baby shells and 5 inserts. Get 2 of the inserts with thicker layers. Then purchase more if needed. They're actually cheaper to purchase on their website than on Amazon. (More on reusable diapers in an upcoming Potty Training post.)

10. DIY Baby Wipes

With soap and witch hazel, these are actually antibacterial, whereas Pampers wipes are not; they just wipe off the poop, they don't sanitize.

Get the tutorial here. 

I did not use Grapeseed Oil or Olive oil, but everything else was the same.

Tip: Use the Viva paper towels without the indent-marks. The smooth texture is better for baby butt. Don't get the kind that has the "Choose a Size" option. You want the full sheet size.

A large Folgers tub is great for storing! Or a gallon size Ziploc bag. Make up a big batch; it lasts a long time. It won't go bad for a year or so. Just tip the jug up and down a few times (don't shake it or it'll get bubbly) to distribute the oil before you pour it over your paper towels.

Things You Think You Need But Actually Don't

This is a whole separate list of things you can replace/reuse with other things, or just stop buying altogether.

1. Diaper Disposal Bags

Look, everybody shits. Babies do it like four times a day. If you're worried about people smelling it in your garbage, throw it in the outside bin.

2. Trendy Storage Bins from Target

Use a shoebox. Or an empty mason jar, or the box your Amazon package came in. Reduce, Reuse, Recycle!

This list could go on ad infinitum, but instead I advise that when you're thinking about a purchase, ask yourself, "Do I need it?" Odds are you don't, but if you still think you do, ask yourself what you could use instead.

Captain Planet would be so proud.

Save Money, Help the Environment and Improve Your Health, Vol. 1: In the Kitchen

The Go Family's ongoing journey toward health has had myriad positive side effects. One of which has been the mind-blowing expansion of my at-home cooking knowledge. Another has been saving a boatload of money by doing said at-home cooking.

Did you know you're allowed to make your own condiments? It's true! And it's not even hard.

The following are all so stupid easy to make that even seeing the prices on them in the grocery store makes me pull a lemon face. In no particular order, here are some of the staples in our kitchen that are not only free of hidden additives, but save you money, help the environment by creating less waste and make you sound really cool by going full-on DIY:

1. Salad Dressing

Look at the ingredients list on the back of the salad dressings at the grocery store. I dare you to find one without added sugar. Ok, there's probably one or two for $6/bottle, but why waste your money and then have garbage to throw away at the end when you can make your own in the old pickle jar you have sitting on the top shelf of your pantry?

Here are some easy, yummy vinaigrette recipes for literally a fraction of the cost of store-bought. We've been on a Ranch Dressing Bender that has the added bonus of being high in fat (see #4 below). Extra credit for growing your own dill on your windowsill.

basil, dill and cilantro

2. Salsa

Canned salsa has a different taste than fresh, but I'm not at the canning stage yet and fresh is so easy to make and tastes so good that I see no reason to stray. 

I use this recipe but in a batch with 3 tomatoes instead of 6. Throw your ingredients in a food processor and that's literally all there is to it.

Compare $2 per fresh, delicious batch (roughly 16 oz) with the price of jarred salsa at your grocery store, and then start questioning all of the purchases in your cart.

3. Almond Butter

Prepackaged almond butters at the store are so expensive it hurts my eyes to look at. Our Whole Foods does fresh-grind for $8.99/lb, but you can get $6.88/lb raw almonds on Amazon Prime Subscribe & Save (or $8.08/lb for a one-time purchase). (I could do a whole post on the virtues of Amazon Prime but I'll condense it down to say on S&S you get 20% off the things you buy on a monthly basis.)

Toast the almonds for 10 minutes at 350 and then food process the hell out of them. Honestly just let it go for like 10 minutes, scraping down the sides intermittently, until the oils release and you get creamy dreamy almond butter of a consistency to your liking.

If you want a step by step, Google 'easy almond butter' or just go here.

4. Mayonnaise

The mayonnaises are suspiciously never refrigerated in the store so I had no idea the ingredients include raw egg. But lo, combine an egg with light olive (or sesame) oil and you get delicious, additive-free mayo! 

I use a combination of this recipe and this recipe from my bro, Sarah Fragoso. Mustard and cayenne in your mayo is most excellent and highly recommended. Use an immersion blender for maximum impact and minimal time investment. 

Use your homemade mayo and windowsill herbs in your ranch dressing to impress your dinner guests.

A Note About Supplies

The only thing you might not already have to make most of these is a food processor. We bought this Cuisinart in 2011 and still use it on the reg. (Side note: make your own smoothies in this bad boy. Half a frozen banana, a couple frozen strawberries and some milk. Throw a spinach leaf in there for the baby, she'll never even know. DO NOT go to Jamba Juice for this shit or I will disown you.)

This Cuisinart immersion blender is also pretty rad. It's almost worth it just for the mayo alone, but I've used it to make mashed potatoes and other creams as well.

Honorable Mentions:

5. Pizza/Pasta Sauce

While not a staple, I make it once every couple months or so and it's so crazy easy I can't even walk down the sauce aisle anymore without having a fit.

Don't pay upwards of $3/jar (for comparable quality) when you can get a can of tomato sauce and tomato paste, throw it together with an onion and some spices for less money, and not have to deal with another glass jar floating around in your pantry.

I use Sarah's recipe from this book that I use allllll the time, but you can Google 'paleo pasta sauce' and get some ideas.

6. Gluten-Free Bread

While not a condiment, Babs loves a good ole Almond Butter and Jelly sandwich, and you can't make those without bread. You can get fancy with it, just like you can with anything, but the Gluten-Free (Paleo) bread recipes I use have about 5 ingredients. They usually require a lot of eggs and mine never seem to rise to a traditional bread shape; they're more like biscotti. But it's mainly a vehicle for almond butter anyway so it doesn't matter.

it's so flat. maybe my bread pan is too big??

This one was Babs' favorite for a few weeks, until she moved on to the 'nothing but smoothies and pie' phase we're currently on.

7. Sauerkraut

There's not huge cost savings here, since you can get a can of Kraut for .79 and a head of cabbage for .69, roughly. But Mr. Go claims to like homemade better, so I do my best not to get cuts on my fingers before I make a batch. Learn How to Make Homemade Sauerkraut in a Mason jar here.

The Extra Bonus: When you make these things yourself, you not only save your hard-earned money for better things like retirement, you also have a reason to reuse your old mason jars instead of paying for packaging and then throwing that packaging away.

Live Green and Save Green.